Dec 31, 2009

Not Here...

but HERE today! I know I haven't posted here in a while. Sorry if you are one of my readers. I have sorta taken a mini break from both of my blogs as well as PPN. I am believing that in the new year God is going to speak more to me or maybe I will take more time to listen is more like it. Either way, if I feel impressed to share I will. Anyway, lately He has been speaking to me...and today I wrote about it over on the Pastoring Partners Network. An awesome network of women in the ministry as Pastors, PWs, Sunday school teachers, ect...Go check it out!

Nov 19, 2009

Still Looking...

for the song! Yes if you have even come across this blog for the last few posts you have read I am seraching for a song I heard on the radio. Still can't find it but I am finding some very POWERFUL songs out there. This next one I found...well heard on the radio today hit me so hard I just sat in the car bawling for a good 30 mins. It just hit me squared in the heart strings. Has such a POWERFUL message. Read the words here and then listen. Let the Lord minister to you as He did me today.


You Deliver Me ~ Selah

Deep as the ocean, Bright as rain
This powerful emotion lifts me up above the planes
It's taken me to places I never thought I'd go
Showing me a grace I never thought I'd know

When I feel like I can't go on
You deliver me
When the road is winding and way too long
You deliver me
You deliver me

I feel like a sinner, my sins have been washed clean
I'm absolutely given, this heart has never seen
I must be forgiven sometimes asking why
I was chosen to be given you in this life

When I feel like I can't go on
You deliver me
When the road is winding and way too long
You deliver me
You deliver me

When there's a distance
Between what I am and who I want to be
You deliver me

When I feel like I can't go on
You deliver me
When the road is winding and way too long
You deliver me
You deliver me

When I feel like I can't go on
You deliver me
When the road is winding and way too long
You deliver me
You deliver me

Nov 17, 2009

Still Searching

Well I am still searching for the song. I heard it twice today. I love it and wish I could remember it more. I never have a pen handy or paper when I hear it. Next time I am gonna call the radio station and ask them for the name and artist! I did find this song that the lyrics are similiar to the song I am searching for but it's still not the one. Enjoy!

Oct 16, 2009

Hiding Place

Today as I was going to to the store to pick up a few things I heard a beautiful worship song. I wish I had had a pen and paper to write it down but I didn't. So tonight I went seeking it on youtube.com with no luck. Sorta hard to find something without a title or artist. Anyway I came upon this video and the song is exactly what my heart is wanting right now. I pray it ministers to you.

Oct 8, 2009

Just Say It Series

I was planning to post every part of the series that Deanna is doing about what Pastors want to say and think but I have decided I am just going to post links to it. I may post the entire blog a few times like I did yesterday but if you are really interested in what she has to say as I am go check her out over here.

Oct 7, 2009

Just Say It!! ~ Guest Speaker Deanna Shrodes

Ok here goes - My dear friend Deanna Shrodes is starting a new series and it's great! I wanted to share it with you and so each posting on this series she will be doing I will be posting on my blog. She is a wonderful minister and friend. I hope you enjoy, are challenged and that your eyes are open and have ears to hear on this subject!
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"Just Say It!!"

Writing a series of posts on this topic has been on my heart for a while but I was just pushed over the proverbial edge last week to do something about it, so here goes. Recently we ministered at a wonderful church and the service went great and afterwards the pastors said to us, "Thank you so much for coming in and saying what we can't say." I hear that all the time when I preach at places. I hear it from America, to Africa, from small towns to large ones. Now, let me say I totally understand. This is how I lived for all of our years in ministry until we came to Florida. And I don't look down on people nor blame them for feeling that way or running the church that way. Pastors who wait for a guest speaker to come in and say what they evidently can't say are in abundance and are also in a very tough situation. Let me tell you, church people have NO IDEA what pastors go through. Did you know a survey was done of the most stressful jobs in America and pastor came in at #2. [The number one spot went to dentists. Evidently a lot of them even commit suicide or have breakdowns. The reason given was because most people hate going to the dentist and so they are used to people dreading coming to see them. Also, they are doing tedious work in a small space - people's mouths - all day long.] Over the coming weeks, I am going to do some posts about what your pastor wishes they could just bring out in the open and tell you, but some fear to. I want to share with you the ins and outs of what makes some of them very stressed out and what you can do to help them. In our previous pastorate, we would go through difficult situations of various kinds, just as all pastors do. A few times a year we would have a guest speaker and although we wouldn't tell them the problems beforehand or ask them to address certain things, Larry and I would pray out hearts out that the visiting minister would come in and "say what we couldn't say." (Translation: say what we would say if we didn't have the threat of World War III breaking out in the church, or being forced to resign because we simply laid the issues honestly on the table.) I remember at a previous pastorate how we prayed and fasted for a season, believing for God to speak to a guest evangelist to deal with some things that were current problems in the church. One lady had been giving us serious issues for some time. There were even times she would inappropriately interrupt the service. One time she had the gall to approach the pulpit when my husband was ministering and said, "The Lord has told me to take this service in a different direction." Of course he didn't put up with that and told her to sit down. She did but she would push the envelope constantly and it was so draining to deal with. We prayed that the evangelist would get a Word from God and deal with this lady. Lo and behold he called her out right there in the service and dealt with her! He gave her a word of knowledge and said, "you are out from under the authority of the pastors and have a critical spirit and need to submit to the pastors and he leadership of this church." We hadn't told the evangelist anything. This was a total God thing. And, the service where this happened the lady said NOTHING to show her true colors-- she was just quietly sitting in her seat. When all this was happening I was playing the keyboard in the background as he ministered and it was everything I could do to not show emotions as all this happened. I kept a poker face, and just stood there and played when the evangelist corrected her but afterwards when we went home, I jumped up and down and was leaping and praising God. So, why didn't I just deal with her? We were in a political hornet's nest. We feared for our ministry, our family, our livelihood. It's the place where way too many pastors find themselves. So, when I moved to Florida I said, "never again." I am NOT going go all year long with unaddressed situations, afraid to say it like it is, just praying that a guest comes in and "says something I can't." I thought, "I'll say it like it is plain and simple, and if they don't like it, I'll resign and go be a greeter at Walmart and hand out smiley stickers." Seriously. I am NOT kidding. And that's how I've lived for the last 7+ years! Occasionally we have speakers come in who will say things in our church here like, "Now, I'm telling you folks this...your pastor would probably like to tell you this but he/she can't do that..." and our people look puzzled as if to say, "what are you talking about? There's really not much if anything that our pastors would not dare to say." I do realize that many pastors are understandably afraid.. They aren't ready to pack their U-Haul and start passing out the smiley stickers and go on government assistance and then explain to their kids that they have no money for school clothes or supplies simply because Daddy or Mommy had to speak the truth about something in church. I get it...really I do. But I'm not afraid anymore and haven't been for a long time. So here's what's up. I'm writing a series of posts coming up..."what your pastor wants to say but can't." This is going to be so fun. Because a lot of people who are church folks across the nation and beyond read this blog and hopefully it will open some eyes as to what your pastor really thinks but might not ever dare to tell you. For those who wonder what my church people are going to think reading these posts, not to worry...they've heard all this already -- and more. And, they seem to want to keep me around for a really long time despite it. Or maybe even because of it...

Sep 18, 2009

Not here this week...go here...

I am not writing here this week. Not that I don't want to but I have been working on something special for another site. Pastoring Partners Network. It's a fantastic life line for you women who are pastors, PWs or women serving in the ministry in any form. I was honored to be asked to be a part of this wonderful online ministry by the founder, Deanna Shrodes. Not only did she ask me to be a contributing writer but also a board member. I have to say its very humbling to me to be asked to serve in this capacity. I love this ministry and I love the women who are part of this ministry. So this week I posted a new blog over here. Go check it out! It's good for everyone not just those in ministry!

Sep 8, 2009

Jesus Bring the Rain by Mercy Me

I was listening to the radio tonight and this song came one like 5 times within 2 hours. It really struck a cord with me tonight. Not sure why but it really touched my heart.

Here are the words:


I can count a million times
People asking me
how I can praise You
with all that I've gone through
The question just amazes me
Can circumstances possibly
Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed
Long before these rainy days
It's never really ever crossed my mind
To turn my back on you, oh Lord
My only shelter from the storm
But instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray
Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus, bring the rain

I am yours regardless of
the clouds that may loom above
because You are much greater than my pain
You who made a way for me
suffering your destiny
so tell me
whats a little rain

Holy, holy, holy
Holy, holy, holy
is the lord God almighty
is the lord God almighty
I'm forever singing

I love it when I find a song that really ministers to my heart and also makes me say, "Yes Lord that is my cry tonight!" I have gone through a lot in my life, like a lot of people. But I have to say I would rather walk in my shoes than someone else's. Even the most well put together person has hurts and things they have gone through. I think I will chose to follow the plan God has for my life and if that means some pain along the way that pulls me closer to Him then I will face it with courage and hope, trusting Him for the outcome.

Sep 4, 2009

Guest Speaker Deanna Shrodes

This morning I went through my daily ritual of coffee and blogs. Yes I actually read the blogs before my quiet time with the Lord. But I can assure you that my quiet time with the Lord is coming and I am looking forward to spending time in the word and in prayer. But before I do that I had to post this. My dear friend Pastor Deanna Shrodes writes monthly for Take Root and Write. This months post is awesome. I so needed to hear this this morning! I believe all women do but especially women in ministry regardless of their position but especially for women pastors and pastor's wives. But I also feel that the other men and women in the church need to hear what is being said. So sit back and open your heart to the Lord as you read this post!

Vital Signs by Pastor Deanna Shrodes

"Stop the ministry! I want to get off!" How many of you pastor's wives have said that? Every friend I've got in ministry (and I've got lots of them!) have said that at least once if not a million times. Before I even go any further, I want you to say to yourself out loud, "I AM NOT ALONE!" If you don't believe that and still feel like you are, email me and say, "I feel alone." You don't even have to share any other details, just those three words if that's all you're comfortable saying, and I'll shoot you back an e-mail in a New York minute and reassure you the truth of the matter that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. One of the devil's biggest lies he tries to get you to believe is that you are alone. Let me give you some statistics from a survey that show you that you aren't as alone as you might think...
In the Enrichment Journal article, "Stress Management for Women in Ministry, author Joann Butrin says the following: "When pastors’ wives were asked to name the things that cause the most stress in their lives, the most common responses were: balancing the demands of the congregation with the responsibilities of raising children, being a supportive wife, keeping an organized household, and feeling guilty for not giving enough time for any of these roles. Other responses included: feeling frustrated at being relegated a lesser role while feeling the same call to ministry as one’s husband, feeling unappreciated in the support role of pastor’s wife, feeling drained by the constant schedule demands that go with ministry, and feeling isolated and alone due to taboos concerning friendships in the church."
Stress is a given when we accept the role of a minister's wife but that doesn't make it any easier. No amount of reading, training or even mentoring beforehand could ever prepare one for what they will face in full time ministry. I stopped to think about it the other day and realized I don't have many friends who are pastor's wives who haven't faced some serious physical complications as a result of stress. This is not only with pastor's wives at mid-life or older but even younger ones. I came to the conclusion, we can't hear enough about stress management!
The other day I went to a meeting for ministers in my area that was a mandatory thing for our denomination. I have to be honest that at first, I dreaded it. I was overwhelmed with a full schedule that day and had so much to deal with, the last thing I needed was a three hour mandatory meeting to add to the insanity that was my day. Once I got there, my attitude changed. Our presbyter (overseer over our area) had prepared a workshop on stress management in ministry. He shared some things I really needed to hear and be reminded of.
One of the first things he shared was that when a person becomes president of the United States, everything is monitored very carefully, from their diet to their sleep schedule, exercise, and even mandatory vacations! There are those who criticize because our various presidents have taken vacations and even during critical times in the nation's history but the truth of the matter is, during that time they probably needed the vacation all the more to hold up under the pressure. Our leader went on to say that they are very protective of the president because he must be able to function at his optimal best to lead the nation, and without these basics being well covered in his life, his health and safety is at risk. He went on to say that we in the ministry are front line warriors and very important leaders in our nation and how much more do we need to carefully "monitor all of our "vitals?"
In Mark 6, we see that the feeding of the five thousand had just taken place. A busy time of ministry had just concluded, for sure. Perhaps Jesus Himself was thinking, "stop the ministry, I want to get off!" We know this because in verses 30-32 in indicates he immediately called for a break:
"The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught. Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest." So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place." Mark 6:30-32 (NIV)
How long has it been since you took stock of what you are eating? Stolen away for some quiet time? Enjoyed some moments of solitude? Years ago a counselor told me I had better plan to do this for myself because no one else would ever be standing in line to do it for me. He was right. Church members usually have little regard for their pastor's quiet time and if you don't take a stand, nobody will. Pastor Perry Noble of Newspring Church in Anderson, SC, says the following, "I know WAY too many pastors who let the expectations and demands of needy, clingy church people (notice I didn’t say Christians) DRIVE them to a place of insanity and burnout…and then those same church people will stand around his coffin and talk about how he should have taken better care of himself."
This is so true. To share a typical and humorous story about this, a number of years ago a woman called me on my day off and said, "I know it's your day off but I needed to call you. We are having terrible marriage problems and I need to talk." I was expecting to hear that her husband had just left, or that she found out that day about an affair, or something of new and shocking revelation. Instead she continued on and told me about many problems they had over the years. I interrupted a few moments later and said, "what new thing has happened today or this week in this situation?" She said, "nothing." I said, "how long have you had this problem you are calling me about today?" She said, "Hmmm...well, since 1972." I said, "So this has been going on since 1972, nothing has changed, but you are calling me about it today?" She said, "Yeah, I just finally felt like talking about it." This was the "emergency."
Many in our church or ministries will not understand this. We are never going to get it across to everyone in an understandable way and quite frankly if that is our goal we will more than likely never achieve it or have everyone happy with us. But we CAN decide how to respond each day. A healthy response means that we monitor our vitals and take the time we need when we need it whether anyone understands or not. The other day our presbyter admonished us, "You've got to do this, or soon. . .cancer is coming for you. . .ulcers are coming for you. . .a heart attack is coming for you. . ."
That got my attention. I decided to come home and make a list of things I needed to more closely monitor. Some will understand, some won't. But that's okay -- we have to do what is right and take care of ourselves so we can take care of others properly.
Are you monitoring your vitals?




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Me here. Good stuff huh! Now go check out more of what Deanna shares daily on her blog. She is very straightforward and open and I LOVE that about her! She is a trooper for God and I cherish our friendship, her wisdom and her love for God and the lost. Love ya D!

Aug 11, 2009

All We Ever Needed - Rush of Fools



A heavy heart I bring
For I am tired Lord
Awaken my lost love for You
Take this heart of stone
And warm this bitter cold
Awaken my lost love for You

Let your children fall down and worship
Fall down and know You
For You are holy
Let Your children rise up before You
Rise and adore You
For You are holy
You are holy

Remind us who we are
When we have wandered far
Awaken our lost love You
And like the morning star
You chase away the dark
There is no shadow here with You
With You, Lord

Let Your children fall down and worship
Fall down and know You
For You are holy
Let Your children rise up before You
Rise and adore You
For You are holy

Just a glimpse of You is all we ever needed
Just a touch from You is all we ever needed
Just a glimpse of You is all we ever needed
Its all that we are needing now

Let Your children fall down and worship
Fall down and know You
For You are holy
Let Your children rise up before You
Rise and adore You
For You are holy

Jul 23, 2009

Stagnant Pools

A week ago I was sharing with a friend that sometimes people get stuck in stagnant pools and forget that all they have to do is walk into the river to be refreshed. Well that has stuck with me and I haven’t been able to shake it. So I have been doing some research on stagnant pools and stagnant water.
Water stagnation occurs when water stops flowing or is trapped in an area where nothing can move. Stagnant water can be a major environmental hazard, generally it breeds bacteria and gets a foul smell. I am quite sure many people have experienced the nasty smell of stagnate water. In some cases its enough to make a person lose their lunch so to speak.
So what does this have to do with our walk with God. A LOT! First and foremost scripture tells us repeatedly that He is ALIVE! Jesus even calls himself the living bread, living water (John 4:14). God is a living moving God. He NEVER changes but is always moving. He doesn’t want us to get stale. He doesn’t want us to dry up or become stagnate. When we get stuck in a rut so to speak we because like a pool of stagnant water. We begin to stink, our attitudes stink, our thoughts stinks and we begin to believe the lies satan feeds us, such as you too old to be used by God, you’re not a preacher, you’re not smart enough or rich enough or talented enough. God can and will use any person that is willing to be used!

God is a living moving being. Jesus tell us in John 7:38 - “Have faith in Me, and you will have life-giving water flowing from deep inside you, just as the Scriptures say.”

Life-giving water flowing…no where in these words does it say dryness or stagnant water. Jesus says having faith in Him gives us life giving water flowing deep inside us. Often times we forget who it is that give us the abilities to do what He has call us to do for Him. If we hold fast to this promise then all we set our hands to will have life as long as it’s for His glory and not our own.
Why not jump in the river! A flowing living river and we start by confessing our sins and our faith in Him to forgive us. Are you stuck in a stagnant pool…come to the river and wash your self in God’s love and forgiveness. Letting go of all the yuck and stink that has caused you to be sick spiritually. Maybe you already have a relationship with Him but are still stuck. Sometimes the stagnation in our lives is caused from stinking thinking. Throw down those thoughts of unworthiness and grab hold of the promises of God’s word. He can and will use you if you are truly willing to be used by him. Sometimes that means throwing down our pride and sometimes that means throwing down our own wants and desires and relying on His plan and not our own.
Get in the river and let Him use you!!

Jul 22, 2009

Don't Leave the Ministry ... Spiritually, remove your safety net!

Today's blog is by a guest speaker and a good friend from college, Pastor Charlie Hughes. Take time and read this and let it sink in and resonate in your spirit! You can read more of Charlie's writings here!

1 Kings 19:20-21 Elisha said to Elijah "Let me kiss my father and mother good-by, then I will come with you. Elijah replied. Go back. Then verse 21 says "So Elisha left him and went back. He took his yoke of oxen and slaughtered them. He burned the plowing equipment to cook and the meat and gave it to the people, and they ate. Then he set out to follow Elijah ...."Wow! Now that's a response to the call of ministry. Remember, this is how Elisha responded after Elijah the great prophet came and threw his cloak around him. This meant that God was calling Elisha to become a prophet like Elijah. But, look at his response. He slaughtered his oxen, burned the plowing equipment, and followed ... Basically, ELISHA BURNED HIS SAFETY NET IN CASE THE MINISTRY DIDN'T WORK OUT.It's no secret how many ministers are leaving the ministry these days, but could it be that we haven't "spiritually" burned our safety net yet. Become resolute, that God has called me, and there's no turning back, no matter how difficult it gets.In the gospels, Jesus said, no man who puts his hand to plow and looks back is fit for the Kingdom. And in the words of GENE JACKSON "Never Quit, You Can Never Quit."I just felt someone needs to hear this.

Jul 12, 2009

How Great is Our God

A friend of mine posted these videos on facebook. I thought they were great so come back daily.

Jul 9, 2009

Through it All

I posted this a few months ago. It just really ministers to my heart and is a prayer today.

Jul 7, 2009

How Sad...

...that these two churches have put more energy into what their sign says than actually reaching the lost souls for Christ!
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This is literally a 'church signs' debate, being played out in a Southern US town, between Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic Church, and Cumberland Presbyterian, a fundamentalist church. From top to bottom shows you the response and counter-response over time. The Catholics are displaying a much better sense of humor! You get the impression that the Presbyterians are actually taking this seriously and are getting a bit upset...
Unfortunately I can not figure out how to make these pics stand out more but this is what is said
"All dogs go to Heaven"
"Only humans go to heaven, read the Bible"
"God loves all His creation dogs included"
"Dogs do not have souls, this is not open to debate"
"Catholic dogs go to heaven, Presbyterian dogs can go talk to their pastor"
"Converting to Catholocism does not magically grant your dog a soul"
"Free dog souls with conversion"
"Dogs are animals there aren't any rocks in heaven either"
"All rocks go to heaven."
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Now you tell me how pitiful this is. If more churches were centered on reaching the lost for Christ they would not have time to play with their church signs!

Jul 5, 2009

The Shack


Last week a friend of mine gave me this book, called "The Shack" by William P. Young. This book was awesome! I loved it and highly recommend everyone reading it. It truly made me laugh, cry, think and touched me deeply. You can go here to read the forward and first chapter of the story. This book was truly a life changing book. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. If you do read it let me know what you think. I would love to have a discussion of what you thought!

Jun 22, 2009

Fresh Rain

Ever need a fresh touch of the Holy Spirit? A fresh rain to quench your thirst? I sure do! Lately we have been getting a TON of rain and now we are headed for a week of intense heat with the heat index at or above 105 degrees. Let's just say that is just draining! We are making some big decissions about a bunch of stuff and right now what I need like my plants needed (picture below) is a fresh rain from heaven to quench my thirst. Well maybe not quench it but I sure am thirst for more of Him and His power in my life. More of His love, His grace, His forgiveness, JUST MORE OF HIM! "Lord let Your power fall, Let Your Voice be heard, Come and change my life as I stand on Your Word, Holy Spirit Rain Down!" My prayer for this week!
This picture was taken during a rain storm! Boy was that plant happy for that rain!

Jun 13, 2009

Trusting

Lately we have had a LOT of things going on around here. So many things that I am not at the moment able to even post. Private things that we are trusting God for. We are in a transition period and are expecting some big changes for our family in a lot of different ways. Unfortuately even if I were at liberty to talk about them God has been speaking to me about keeping things quiet and in prayer. A few of my closest readers may know what I am speaking about...or at least a few of the things that is. But seriously there are a few things that I have been petitioning before the Lord about and trusting Him to give us the direction, guidance and provision we need for these other things to happen. SO until He releases me to share some of these things I will simple continue to sing:


You are God in heaven
And here am I on earth
So I'll let my words be few
Jesus, I am so in love with You

And I'll stand in awe of You, Jesus
Yes, I'll stand in awe of You
And I'll let my words be few
Jesus, I am so in love with You

The simplest of all love songs
I want to bring to You
So I'll let my words be few
Jesus, I am so in love with You

Jun 9, 2009

We are God's Masterpiece

A friend posted this on Facebook. It really ministered to my heart this morning hope it does yours too!

May 25, 2009

Wonderfully Delicious Cake!

Ok so my Fishing series didn't go as long as I wanted it to. Sure I could have taken a spin on the reel on a lot of different subject but lets get serious here, how many more blogs do you need to read about casting out your hook and reeling in the fish...in other words fishing for souls. Seriously, this blog is suppose to be about my personal walk with God and if you get blessed by it great and if not great....seriously it's not really out here for you or for me to gain readers or popularity. I hope to minister to my readers but if not then I hope it glorifies God!

A friend of mine sent me this little story and it ministered to me. I needed to hear it tonight and thought instead of it just ministering to me I hope it will minister to others. I have NO idea who wrote it just know it has lots of truth! Enjoy!
Sometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Here is a wonderful explanantion!
A daughter is telling her Mother how everthing is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away.
Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, "Absolutely Mom, I love your cake."

"Here, have some cooking oil," her Mother offers.
"Yuck," says her daughter.
"How about a couple of raw eggs?" "GROSS, Mom!"
"Would you like some floour then? Or maybe baking soda?"
"Mom, those are all nasty!"

To which the mother replies: "Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake!"

God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God know that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will make something wonderful!

May 21, 2009

Celebrations (#3 in series)

Every day we went fishing I witnessed my kids celebrate every fish caught, whether they caught it or someone else did. There would be yelling, such as :"Yay Jaron, Eli, Sara or Kris, You did it, you caught a fish...that's awesome!" It didn't matter if the fish was 2 inches or 6 inches long, they supported each other. Yes occasionally there were a few times when someone would be mad that they hadn't caught a fish yet but someone would encourage them to keep trying. We saw that a lot when it took Kris a few days before he caught his first fish!
Honestly this was the first time I have seen this happen in our family. You know how kids are, if someone gets something they all want it. The fact that they were all supporting each other and were not demonstrating the constant jealously attitude was great!
Celebration! We need to praise the Lord through all things and in everything give Him praise. The Word of God tells us that if we do not praise Him the rocks will. It also tells us, "Let everything that has breath praise the Lord (Ps 150:6)!" In our church on of the oldest members just recently became a grandma again to a precious baby boy. We celebrated with her! What a blessing, God is increasing her family! When friend bought a new house we celebrated with her! When one of the kids in our church worked hard in school and made the honor roll, I watched the other kids celebrate with him! When our power was restored we celebrated...even Kris yelled, " Thank you Jesus!"
We were created for fellowship with Christ, we also were created to praise Him. Praise is an attitude of the heart! Last week we had reason to flip out and get mad, we lost our power which caused us to lose all the food in our fridge and freezer. On Friday our tire was punctured and it had to be replace and then Sean realized that the other back tire needs to be replaced. On Sat. our dryer died and with a large family a dryer is an essential tool that is used daily. On Sunday morning I CHOSE to stand and give God praise no matter what comes our way! We really could have been upset about the food issue but God provided our daily needs and we gave HIM praise for that. Thank you Jesus! Now here's something to shout about...we were just given $125 specifically to cover part of the food that we lost! Isn't God great! Had we chose to blame God for the storm and the ultimate loss of our food we may not have been blessed. We totally believe that it was because of our sacrificial praise that God has supplied.
You see we have to chose to praise Him! Last week was tough and we could have been grumpy and yet because we chose to see God's goodness and praise Him for who He is and what He has done we were blessed. Choosing to praise the Lord even for the small things is a conscious decision. You have to choose to celebrate or be grumpy. In the body of Christ we all need to celebrate with each other's accomplishments, great and small. We all need that support, sometimes it comes from family and friends, other times it comes from the knowledge that Jesus Christ is sitting next to His Father praying for you! We all need to be anchored to something and my hope is YOU are anchored to the cross!
Today I choose to celebrate all that He has given me, great and small! Do You?
Lord I thank you for all things! I give You praise no matter what! I will not let the rocks cry out for me today, I will not let the trials and dissapointments steal my joy. Today Lord I choose to honor You in all I do and it starts with giving You praise for the flowers You have created, for the home You have provided and for the family You have blessed me with! Thank you Lord!

May 20, 2009

Tangles ( #2 of the Fishing Lines Series)

One of the many things I love about fishing is that it isn't really about catching the fish. Well for me it isn't. It's being able to just relax and be quiet. BUT when you take 4 excited kids fishing there is little peace let alone quiet! No those things do not go hand in hand with the kids and fishing. In fact tangles happen more often with kids when you are teaching them how to cast and reel in their hook.
This one instance I was helping Sara remove a hook from a fish she caught and here comes Eli, crying and mad! Mind you I am in the middle of removing a hook and into my lap he throws his fishing pole. Looking down I can see the cause of his discontentment. A massive tangle!
Let me tell you something, a tangled fishing line is not something you want to deal with...but it builds character and determination. I would love to say that I was able to magically untangle that line or at least say it was untangled within 5 mins. But the truth is it took me over an hour to untangle the mess that was more like a birds nest on his pole! UGH!
In that time God started to show me a few things about that tangle and how it applies to our lives. Our lives are just like that line! How you may ask?! The whole reason that this tangle was created was do to impatience! Eli was having difficulty reeling in his line because the hook got stuck on some underwater plants. Instead of slowly reeling it in or even asking for help he took matters into his own hands and yanked it. When he yanked, the line somehow got wrapped around the pole. He is 5 yr old mind you, so he at that moment had no idea what to do. The best thing would have been to bring it to me or lay it down but instead he started swinging the pole which caused even more issues. Until he threw it into my lap.

Now how many times have you and I done this? We are following God's direction and seeking His will for our lives. You know which way to go and are heading that way but hit a snag, that slows you down or impedes you from going forward and instead of waiting for help or going to your Heavenly Father for guidance you yank! You take matters into your own hands trying to make things happen the way you want or expect them to be done. What do you end up with? A HUGE TANGLE! Once you have this tangle, you like everyone else including me, throws that mess into God's lap. I am sure He must get weary with our messes and having to weave through the mess to get us back on track.
Sometimes God lets us hit those snags to slow us down on purpose! Hello did you read that? GOD LETS US HIT SNAGS TO SLOW US DOWN ON PURPOSE! Yes His word tells us He knows the plans He has for us (Jer 29:11) and sometimes those snags are there on purpose...usually to slow us down so we can get our focus back or to teach and train us in those difficult times. But if we hold on to those promises - that He has a plan and trust Him to get us through those times then we will not deal with the major tangles. Tangles slow us down even more so than those snags!
What snags are you trying to speed by? What tangles have you created because you decided to take matters into your own hands? Today, trust that He KNOWS what is best for you and let go of the line and deal with the snags of life. Maybe instead of trying to fix the snag you should pray for God to remove it or help you through it.

Heavenly Father, I am so guilty of this in my own life. Trying to speed things up when I need to slow down. Lord forgive me for not trusting You for the fine details and trying to control the outcomes. Help me to see the snags in life are your way of helping me get my focus on You and not about my plans.



May 19, 2009

God and the fishing line.

Ok so yes that's a strange title, I'll admit it! But there's a reason for the title. You see last week when our area was hit by a storm that took out our power for over 5.5 days I took the kids fishing daily. Sometimes for more than 3 hours at a time. Which I have to say for our kids to stay focused on one activity for that long is a miracle. Even today the kids asked if I would take them fishing when they get home from school.

Anyways during our fishing trips God has been showing me some things. When I started writing this today I thought it might just be a short little post but I have realized that what I am learning and God is showing me is a lot more than I thought. So this may be a series, not sure how long it will go but I will let you know if it's over. Just keep coming back and checking.

So how does fishing line apply to our lives? Have you ever wondered why it's important to have some kind of weight on your line? Ever casted your line with no weight? What happened? Ever reeled in you line and got so anxious that you jerk the line? What happened? Have you ever caught a fish without using any bait? Do you celebrate even when you catch something small or nothing at all? Have you ever gone fishing unprepared? These are just a few things I will discuss in the next few posts. I hope this series will encourage you in your walk with the Lord. Make sure to leave me a comment and let me know what you think! (please)

So Let me share a bit here before I go any further. A few of these things happened to my kids last week, such as casting with out an anchor (weight). I sat back on the first day I took the kids out and watched Jaron repeatedly cast his line and it plop down in front of him. He was extremely frustrated and almost quit. It was his first time fishing and he had it in his head that he knew what he needed to do. No granted I am not a fisherman. I have only fished when I was his age with my brothers and the kids in the neighborhood. But I knew what part of the problem was. When he could take no more he threw the pole down and said, "I quit!" I asked him if he needed some help and he was so angry he wouldn't listen to me. So I took over. I added a small weight and a bobber replaced the bait (worms-so fun!) and casted the line. When he saw his line fly through the air yards away he was amazed. He asked me what the difference was and I smiled at him and said, "I added the anchor and it helped the line fly!" Had Jaron just completely quit that day he would never have caught the fish he did on that cast.

We are just like that line you know! When we try to do anything in our lives without an anchor in more instances than we realize, we plop! We need an anchor that will help us fly! That anchor is Jesus! We don't plop when we trust in Him and seek His will in all things! Sure things don't always go our way. There were many times Jaron cased out his line to reel in an empty hook but that's just how things happen sometimes. Does this mean God isn't there or that He causes things to happen....NO! There are times when it may seem that way but seriously, is your focus on giving God the glory in all things or is your focus more on you and how He can serve you?

Our Heavenly Father is not a waiter to serve us! In fact we were created to have fellowship with Him and if we are seeking that fellowship, serving HIM will come from the love we have for Him without conditions! So many times I have heard people (including myself here) say, "If God will do this I will do that!" It's bargaining with God and God DOESN'T bargain! There is no instance in the Bible that says He will bargain with you for YOU to get your will. Our purpose is to serve HIM and if we get blessed while doing so great! But if not even more so I will serve Him.

Today are you anchored in the Lord? Are you trying to cast your line in life without an anchor that will help you soar? Why not cast your cares on Him! The one true anchor that will never leave you or forsake you!

Lord in my life I pray I will stay anchored to you and no matter what comes my way I know that You alone will help me succeed in all I set out to do if it will bring YOU glory!

** come back tomorrow to read the next insert in this Fishing line series!

Apr 30, 2009

It's been a while...

OK so it's been a while since I actually shared what is going on here with our family and with Kristofer and the adventures having an autistic child gives to our family. With good reason I haven't posted everything...actually I haven't posted anything but I will promise...later today or tomorrow. But today I want to share something...my whole life I have dreamed of working in an orphanage or even foster care. It's still is a dream of mine and one day I know God will open those doors for us. One day soon I pray God will give us the means to adopt or foster a child. Until he does though I will continue to pray for the orphans throughout the world and pray God will open that door if it be His will as well.


SO today instead of sharing what is going on here in our home I want to introduce you to my a guest speaker/writer, Rennae de Freitas. She and her husband and 4 boys are missionaries to the Dominican Republic. Please read this and let God touch your heart and if you can at all help please do! Everything and anything you can do will help!

What the Note didn't say...
She ran to me with a little note covered in butterfly stickers and placed it in my hands. "Take this to Julie*. I don’t want her to forget me. "I opened the note knowing that I would have to translate it for Julie. Julie didn’t speak Spanish. Yet even without the benefit of the language she had made a special connection with this little girl. A child who once lived as a slave in a miserable shack before she came to Bethesda Home.

The note read:

To: Julie
From: Alejandra

Julie I love you so much. Thank you for coming to share with us at Bethesda Home. Thank you for the shoes. Julie, I will always remember you. Thank you for coming to share with us. I love you Julie.

Julie & Alejandra Friends Forever

What the note didn't say, but what I know is in her thoughts everyday was this question,
“Will Julie remember me?”

Julie came with a team of women from her church and they spent just one week with the Bethesda Home children. That week was a special time for the children as they tremendously enjoy all the attention and mother love. Now, they ask about the ladies all the time and they cherish the photos that we put on the wall to remember our time together. And every time I visit, they ask me if the ladies remember them.

Bethesda Home is a home for abandoned and at-risk children. Some have mothers who are prostitutes and drug addicts; some have been rescued from domestic abuse and slavery. Sister Ketty began this beautiful rescue in 2004 and along with the partnership of her local church and other ministries; she has been able to rent a house for these children. The house that they currently live in is up for sale.

Last Thursday I sat down with Sister Ketty after she called to tell me to pray about a meeting that she was to have with the lawyers representing the house. The owners are now giving us two months to purchase the house or they will be forced to take it back.

So today we find ourselves in anticipation of a REALLY BIG MIRACLE. The owners are asking $250,000. This is a very large home and the PERFECT location for the home. We really do not want to lose this house.

Please pray for Bethesda home and Sister Ketty as we walk this journey toward our miracle. Ask the Holy Spirit how you can be a part and then ACT in FAITH & OBEDIENCE. You will never regret it. I feel a lot like Alejandra. We were blessed to meet some amazing women on the teams that came to visit but there is that nagging question in the back of my mind.

It's what the note didn't say. After the ladies left,

“Will they remember Bethesda Home?”


PLEASE consider helping us.
You can make a secure online contribution
by clicking this link
Please note Project #14261 Class #62 in the comment field.

Or you can send your contribution to:
Assemblies of God World Missions
1445 Boonville Ave
Springfield, MO 65802
Mark your check or money order for project #14261 Bethesda Home Dom. Rep.

*some names have been changed to protect the identity of those involved
************************************
Me again...I know the economy is tough...trust me I know! But if you can help even just a few $$ I know God will multiply it. God is a big God and He owns the cattle on a thousands hills and all He has to do is sell one of those cows. But He is a God who likes to work in and through His people. Pray about what you can do! Rennae and Nelson are doing some great work where God has placed them. My sister-n-law just went on a missions trip where she was able to be with these kids at this orphanage...her life was changed. Please help them save this house!

Apr 18, 2009

Waiting...

Hmmmmm.......so many thoughts going through my head. SO many things I don't understand. The waiting is killing me, the unknown is driving me nuts, Lord what are YOU DOING? So I sit and wait...pray and wait...serve and wait....worship and wait... for the word tells us...


Isa 40:31 But those who trust & wait in the LORD will find new strength. They will be strong like eagles soaring upward on wings; they will walk and run without getting tired.

So I will wait....I will wait on You Lord and in that time I will pray, I will seek, I will trust, I will worship and I will serve.

Apr 11, 2009

Apr 10, 2009

Apr 9, 2009

God I just don't understand what you are doing or why? Ya wanna give us a little clue???

Mar 29, 2009

Spring is upon us.

So spring is coming, trees are waking up, flowers are blooming and here we are awaiting God's arrival on the scene. We are in the process of waiting for answers, guidance and direction in so many aspects of our lives and for our family. We know God has some exciting plans. When God makes the plans you know they will eb exciting and full of adventure and change.
Speaking of change, I have a love hate relationship with change. I love to change up my livingroom but I hate big life altering changes. Oh I get excited about them but I want to know the plans as in all the details of those plans. SO God it sure would be nice if you would clue me in to what Your plans are for our family!

Feb 27, 2009

Feb 24, 2009

Feb 19, 2009

Dear God,

Lately there have been so many things that have come our way but this new situation is a bit unnerving. The prospect is exciting but I am a bit nervous. Do I get my hopes up or not? DO I start planning as if it will take place or not? SO many question I have today so many question I need guidance for. Is there anyway you might drop a message into my heart and let us know for sure.
Trusting in You is all I can do. SO today once again I place my trust in You knowing that every step you have planned and every step is ordered by You. Lord here me today when I say open the doors of heaven and pour out your love and favor unto the sitation we aer facing. Thanks Lord!




Feb 18, 2009

ImageChef.com - Custom comment codes for MySpace, Hi5, Friendster and more
Ok God, I am not complaining here but being laid up in bed due to a concussion and back pain is not acceptable. I really need to finish CC. I have no much that needs done.
HElP me GOD PLEASE!!!

Feb 12, 2009

I'm Just Human

I am so frustrated. Why do people always think that a "pastor's wife or pastor" has to be perfect? Why do they put unfair expectations on us? I am ONLY HUMAN!!! Seriously, I get tired, I get frustrated, overwhelmed, disappointed. I cry, laugh, scream, jump for joy, shout my praise and scream my anger. I AM ONLY HUMAN! I am not a super mom, super wife, super pastor or super pastor's wife.
My house is never immaculate, never spotless, never dust free. Just the opposite! I have 4 children under 8 and yes we stress cleaning and organizing and keeping the house as clean as possible but when you have 4 tornadoes in one house - a mess is bound to happen.
What has prompted this outburst of mine...I am tired of being second guessed. Tired of people tell me I am doing to much or not enough. Yea I happen to agree I am doing too much at times but if no one will reach out, get their bums off the pew and minister to "my" kids then it is my place to make sure they are learning even more so in the house of God. Yes it is my place as a parent to teach my kids the word of God and I have no problem doing so. But when a church body (not the pastors) refuse to start a program that is very much needed to reach the community and I see the need then I must fill the need until someone else see the need and steps up to help.
Yes I believe sometimes having too many fires burning will cause the fire to burn out but right now this is what God has asked me to do. So why does the church body feel that they have the right to question or suggest what I need to do if they are not willing to pitch in and help. Specially when they are not doing anything right now to help in the church anyways.
People out there listen to me...do not criticize those in ministry specially those in leadership if they are putting their all into something, when you yourself are doing nothing to further the kingdom. Sitting on a pew every Sunday does not constitute that you are doing anything for the Lord! Constructive criticism is welcome at least I will listen to it, I may not accept it I may not like it but I will listen and I will mull it over. But I will not listen to a critical spirit when it comes to something the Lord has laid on my heart to do or start! I would not go forward with the plan if it wasn't from God. If I start something then its because God has been working on my heart and showing me what needs to be done. If it's from Him I know it will succeed. If it's not then I know it will fail if I am doing it for the wrong reasons.
Yes I am upset. I am human. I am pouring myself into the ministry the way God has called me to do and yes there are times I feel taken advantage of but it is when I feel taken advantage of that I realize my focus is inward and on myself rather than outward and on God.

It all boils right back down to perspective! It's how you see things. If I view what I do for the church as glorified babysitting then that is what it is and that is when my focus is not on God. But if I view what I am doing every week and all the hours of painting I have put into decorating and transforming the CC room as doing it unto God then its worth every second of my time. One child can change the world!!! If I can reach one child that child could change the world! That is why I do what I do and that is what my passion is about. So instead of criticize what I am doing and what to do why not pray for me and pray with God's strength, guidance and ability that I will succeed at doing this for God!

Jan 30, 2009

Jan 28, 2009

One Word

One word can change everything! A few of my friends are taking up the "One Word" challenge. It's only taken me 27 days to figure out if I really wanted to focus on this word this year....perspective. Here is the definition according to the free dictionary:



a. A view or vista.
b. A mental view or outlook: "It is useful occasionally
to look at the past to gain a perspective on the present" Fabian Linden.
2. The appearance of objects in depth as perceived by normal binocular vision.
3. a. The relationship of aspects of a subject to each other and to a whole: a perspective of history; a need to view the problem in the proper perspective.
b. Subjective evaluation of relative significance; a point of view: the perspective of the displaced homemaker.
c. The ability to perceive things in their actual interrelations or comparative importance: tried to keep my perspective throughout the crisis.
So here's the honesty of why I have chosen my word, because I need a new perspective period. I tend to see the negative, disasterous and the depressed state of situations when it concerns personal issues, situations and complications of daily life. I have no idea why because when someone else shares what they are going through I can pull out the positive and stand believing for their miracle but struggle with doing the same for myself. hmmmm..."God heal my perspective!"


So today a dear friend, Kathy sent me a email and I thought it was fantastic! It is exactly what perspective is all about for me....enjoy!






~LITTLE OLD LADY~

There was a little old lady, who every morning.

Stepped onto her front porch, raised her arms to the sky, and shouted: 'PRAISE THE LORD!'


One day an atheist moved into the house next door. He became irritated at the little old lady. Every morning he'd step onto his front porch after her and yell: 'THERE IS NO LORD!'


Time passed with the two of them carrying on this way every day.


One morning, in the middle of winter, the little old lady stepped onto her front porch and shouted: 'PRAISE THE LORD! Please Lord, I have no food and I am starving, provide for me, oh Lord!


The next morning she stepped out onto her porch and there were two huge bags of groceries sitting there 'PRAISE THE LORD!' she cried out 'HE HAS PROVIDED GROCERIES FOR ME!'


The atheist neighbor jumped out of the hedges and shouted: 'THERE IS NO LORD; I BOUGHT THOSE GROCERIES!!'

The little old lady threw her arms into the air and shouted: "PRAISE THE LORD! HE HAS PROVIDED ME WITH GROCERIES AND MADE THE DEVIL PAY FOR THEM!"

Jan 10, 2009

Are You Proud Lord?

Came across this video on Godtube.com. Its a great song, not sure if its actually towards the Lord but this is my prayer to Him today.

Jan 2, 2009


Lord, I am truly amazed by You! I planned a Lock-In for the kkids of our church and truly didn't have high expectations or thoughts that we would have a good turn out. I figured if we had at least 10 we were doing good. But You as usually meet and exceed my expectations! WOW, 23 kids, 7 being teens! I would never of fathomed it! Again You once again blow my mind! You are truly amazing, Lord! Thank you! Thank you that even when every thing last year in 2008 was tough, there were very dark days and days of joy you were there. I can look back now and see how You were there every step of the way! Thank you!
This year my New Year's resolution is: To stop telling You what to do Lord!