Two weeks out...1st week 13 lbs by docs scale, week two just 2 lb lost. 15 lbs in 2 weeks, not bad at all BUT I really thought it would be more. I know I have to get some perspective, it's hard. This is so much harder than I thought it would be. So hard!!!
It's all mental. Sorta! I get so very hungry and can only eat 3-4 bites if that of anything. I get full quick. I just don't understand why I'm not losing more. Not like I can exercise yet. My stomach is still healing and my back won't let me do much without lots of pain.
Ugh!! Lord help me!
Jun 28, 2018
Jun 22, 2018
So this new journey isn't easy! I'm still trying to figure out how to eat, portions my stomach can handle and oh btw, I'm still eating soft foods like yogurt, applesauce and cottage cheese. I have tried cream of tomato and potato but it weighs heavy on my stomach. The protein shakes take me 2 hrs to finish and fill me up so I won't be hungry for 2-3 hrs later. But even though I get frustrated and am learning I still say my only regret is not doing it sooner!
So I'm week into this new life, new journey. I go to my one week post op doc visit today. I'll be officially weighed in since my last weigh in with their office 10 days ago. If I base my weight loss on my home scale I'm very pleased. Here's what the MOST important change this week has been, I am no longer taking metformin, a diabetes med, AND my insulin has been cut from 100 units a day down to 35 a day and it will have to be changed again as my glucose numbers continue to come down. My numbers were ranging from 190-290 they now are running from 130-200. HUGE improvement!
Some have ask how's the pain and eating going. Won't lie the pain was in some instances worse then the knee surgeries I've had for the first few days. Now the incisions are achy except the largest one, that one still hurts. As for "eating," liquid diet for 10 days is not easy. I have been able to handle a few bites of yogurt which has been the only solid allowed. After today I get to add banana, cottage cheese, creamed soup, peanut butter, plain applesauce, and V8 juice. Yay!!!!
Mentally how am I doing...y'all this is way harder than I thought and I have been prepared. It's not that I'm starving or hungry all the time. Or even upset that I can't have all the junk food that got me here. It's knowing 3 small bites of yogurt fills me up, it's only being able to handle 2 oz of an 11oz protein shake at a time and takes me almost 2 1/2 hours to finish one and when I finally finish it, it's literally time to start another so I get the 3 required in by bed time. And I'm so full from the last that even starting the next one doesn't happen for another hour or two. This are all physical adjustments that I knew would happen, it's just gonna take some time to get use to.
But even with all of the changes in the last week the only regret I have right now is not having the surgery sooner!!!
Some have ask how's the pain and eating going. Won't lie the pain was in some instances worse then the knee surgeries I've had for the first few days. Now the incisions are achy except the largest one, that one still hurts. As for "eating," liquid diet for 10 days is not easy. I have been able to handle a few bites of yogurt which has been the only solid allowed. After today I get to add banana, cottage cheese, creamed soup, peanut butter, plain applesauce, and V8 juice. Yay!!!!
Mentally how am I doing...y'all this is way harder than I thought and I have been prepared. It's not that I'm starving or hungry all the time. Or even upset that I can't have all the junk food that got me here. It's knowing 3 small bites of yogurt fills me up, it's only being able to handle 2 oz of an 11oz protein shake at a time and takes me almost 2 1/2 hours to finish one and when I finally finish it, it's literally time to start another so I get the 3 required in by bed time. And I'm so full from the last that even starting the next one doesn't happen for another hour or two. This are all physical adjustments that I knew would happen, it's just gonna take some time to get use to.
But even with all of the changes in the last week the only regret I have right now is not having the surgery sooner!!!
Jun 17, 2018
Father's day BBQ
Today was my first family get together and BBQ. First that is with my new stomach, new way of eating. Well sorta, I'm still on clear liquids for the most part. I'm allowed yogurt but have to limit it. My protein drinks come first, then water and then I can have Popsicles, yogurt and broth. Broth...not a fan! But, my mom gave me a great idea, use chicken noodle soup, heat and strain. At least the broth will taste good. So I plan to do that for lunch and dinner tomorrow.
So not eating when everyone was enjoying cheese burgers, chips, potato salad, and baked beans was kinda weird. More so for my family than me. My dad really had a hard time with me not eating. I had my protein shake and was fine. But he was really worried. I spent time explaining things too him and hope it helped him understand.
Speaking of my daddy. He truly is the best. He and I had a rough relationship when I was a teenager. I guess a lot of girls do. My reasons wouldn't come to light till I was in my twenties, when I was going through counseling. I was molested by my parents best friend and an older cousin. I guess I blamed my dad for not protecting me as a young child but it wasn't his fault. I came to terms with that and although I have never told him what had happened. I did write a letter of forgiveness. It really wasn't for him but for myself. I have in recent years apologized for being a brat as a teen and our relationship is better than it has ever been. I'm grateful for my relationship with him but even more so my heavenly father. It is because of his healing me of my painful past that I am where I am today, emotionally and spiritually.
SO how does all that tie into my new life, well for the longest time...40 yrs... I used food as an emotional comfort. i can no longer run to food to smooth over my feelings. I must face them, write stuff down and work through what ever is causing me discomfort. Again having the surgery is a tool towards a healthier me in every way!
So not eating when everyone was enjoying cheese burgers, chips, potato salad, and baked beans was kinda weird. More so for my family than me. My dad really had a hard time with me not eating. I had my protein shake and was fine. But he was really worried. I spent time explaining things too him and hope it helped him understand.
Speaking of my daddy. He truly is the best. He and I had a rough relationship when I was a teenager. I guess a lot of girls do. My reasons wouldn't come to light till I was in my twenties, when I was going through counseling. I was molested by my parents best friend and an older cousin. I guess I blamed my dad for not protecting me as a young child but it wasn't his fault. I came to terms with that and although I have never told him what had happened. I did write a letter of forgiveness. It really wasn't for him but for myself. I have in recent years apologized for being a brat as a teen and our relationship is better than it has ever been. I'm grateful for my relationship with him but even more so my heavenly father. It is because of his healing me of my painful past that I am where I am today, emotionally and spiritually.
SO how does all that tie into my new life, well for the longest time...40 yrs... I used food as an emotional comfort. i can no longer run to food to smooth over my feelings. I must face them, write stuff down and work through what ever is causing me discomfort. Again having the surgery is a tool towards a healthier me in every way!
Jun 16, 2018
3 Days Post-Op
So on Wed., June 13, 2018 I had the gastric sleeve weight loss surgery. It went flawlessly. Came home the next afternoon and I am so glad I did. I got better sleep at home for sure. Before I left for the hospital I weighed myself and the scale read 291.7. I was excited just for those numbers. It's weird being in the 200s which hasn't happened since high school.
So one thing everyone on the support pages on Facebook have said is to not get on the scale till a week out. Well I had to at least see how much the gas and IV fluids played with the scale. To my surprise I am already down 5 lbs. 286.4 to be exact. I am in shock for sure! I mean I know I will lose quickly the first few weeks and months but 5 lbs in 3 days is amazing.
So things I am learning... take sips of liquid like drinking hot coffee. other wise it will hurt and may come right back up. I have 6 incisions and right now my abdomen is super sore. the gas is slowly subsiding but is still there and still causes a great deal of pain. I am not hungry at all. Even with the kids eating dinner in front of me, I'm all good. No hunger pains, nothing. It's sorta weird.
Right now I am trying to get the 100 gms of protein in a day and that's not easy at all. Each protein drink has 30 gms but it takes me 2 -2 1/2 hrs to drink 11 ounces. Plus get all my vitamins in and other meds I still have to take. Thankfully I no longer need the metformin for type 2 diabetes. So that's 5 pills I no longer take. I now take more vitamins then I do prescription meds and that is awesome.
Only thing that has me concerned at this moment is that while preforming the surgery my surgeon found my spleen to be enlarged. She says she doesn't understand why because it doesn't look diseased. It could be a variety of things. I googled it, yeah I know bad idea but I really wanted some kind of reference. I will be going to the a specialist and face what ever may come from this. I am believing the reduction of meds will help and that God is going to heal it no matter what.
So my plans for this blog for the next few weeks is just to keep track of my progress, physically and mentally. This was the hardest decision to make and so far it definitely isn't easy. But I know I'll figure out my new life style, new eating habits and will learn thst portions are important and so is learning to deal with things and not run to food as comfort. From now on food is for nutrition first, then enjoyment.
So one thing everyone on the support pages on Facebook have said is to not get on the scale till a week out. Well I had to at least see how much the gas and IV fluids played with the scale. To my surprise I am already down 5 lbs. 286.4 to be exact. I am in shock for sure! I mean I know I will lose quickly the first few weeks and months but 5 lbs in 3 days is amazing.
So things I am learning... take sips of liquid like drinking hot coffee. other wise it will hurt and may come right back up. I have 6 incisions and right now my abdomen is super sore. the gas is slowly subsiding but is still there and still causes a great deal of pain. I am not hungry at all. Even with the kids eating dinner in front of me, I'm all good. No hunger pains, nothing. It's sorta weird.
Right now I am trying to get the 100 gms of protein in a day and that's not easy at all. Each protein drink has 30 gms but it takes me 2 -2 1/2 hrs to drink 11 ounces. Plus get all my vitamins in and other meds I still have to take. Thankfully I no longer need the metformin for type 2 diabetes. So that's 5 pills I no longer take. I now take more vitamins then I do prescription meds and that is awesome.
Only thing that has me concerned at this moment is that while preforming the surgery my surgeon found my spleen to be enlarged. She says she doesn't understand why because it doesn't look diseased. It could be a variety of things. I googled it, yeah I know bad idea but I really wanted some kind of reference. I will be going to the a specialist and face what ever may come from this. I am believing the reduction of meds will help and that God is going to heal it no matter what.
So my plans for this blog for the next few weeks is just to keep track of my progress, physically and mentally. This was the hardest decision to make and so far it definitely isn't easy. But I know I'll figure out my new life style, new eating habits and will learn thst portions are important and so is learning to deal with things and not run to food as comfort. From now on food is for nutrition first, then enjoyment.
So Close
It's been almost 7 months since I started this journey to a healthier and skinner me. Honestly despite my efforts I'm still where I was to begin with. I've gone through lab work, seeing a cardiac doc having an ekg and then an echo of my heart done. Then I saw a pulmonologist and xrays followed by a scope and biopsy of my esophagus and let's not forget the psych eval. With all that being done will being weighed in every month with my doctor and following the diet the nutritionist's diet. I've completed every thing required and now it's in the insurance's hands. I pray it ill be approved but have my doubts it will happen.
I have no idea what will happen if it's not approved. Give up, maybe! I know God has a plan and as much as I hope this is part of it my luck is never good. I seem to always fight battles and honestly I am tired of always fighting.
Many days I have no will to even get out of bed, but I do. My kisds and husband need me to be there for them. But I never feel like I have anyone there for me. I'm an ear and shoulder for others but never have one. It's beyond frustrationg let me tell ya.
Anyway, so here I am in a holding pattern, waiting once again for God to move on my behalf.
I have no idea what will happen if it's not approved. Give up, maybe! I know God has a plan and as much as I hope this is part of it my luck is never good. I seem to always fight battles and honestly I am tired of always fighting.
Many days I have no will to even get out of bed, but I do. My kisds and husband need me to be there for them. But I never feel like I have anyone there for me. I'm an ear and shoulder for others but never have one. It's beyond frustrationg let me tell ya.
Anyway, so here I am in a holding pattern, waiting once again for God to move on my behalf.
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